Tuesday, April 8, 2014

4 Funniest Non-Show-Accurate Toys Ever

It seems like every time I turn around, I'm finding more ridiculous movie and TV show toys and collectibles.  I've collected my favorite finds here.

Best-Lock Stargate "Lego" Toys

Photo via 8of5multiverse.blogspot.com.

First up, these terrible Lego knockoffs that I featured on my blog a few months ago.  At first blush, they look good; the vehicles, DHD, and stargate are accurate enough.  However, when you start looking at the figures, something horrifying appears:


For whatever reason, the artist decided to use old man faces for all the characters.  Did the artist ever look at pictures of the characters, or the actors?  Did they just guess?  I do appreciate that Daniel's expression is a bit incredulous, as it seems most appropriate in this instance.

Hasbro Muscle-Bound Star Wars Figures

Muscle man Luke versus original issue Luke.  Photo via Razyor of nightfallunlimited.com.
These are undoubtedly a classic.  Released in 1995, these action figures came out when I was a kid, and I was admittedly pretty excited about them.  Compared to the films, and even the original figures, these "heroic" sculpts are just ridiculous.  Why does Luke Skywalker have muscles on his muscles?  The "force" is really just steroids?  ...Yeah, didn't think so.

AHI Parachuting Spock

AHI Parachtuing Spock
Spock... with a parachute!  Photo via plaidstallions.com.
I've included this mostly because I think the very idea is funny.  Just think of all the ways that the Star Trek crew could use this to their advantage: Need to escape from ravaging monsters in a hurry?  Use your parachute, Spock!  Have to escape from the Genesis effect (The Wrath of Khan)?  Use your parachute, Spock!  Infiltrating behind enemies' lines?  Use your parachute, Spock!

Limited Edition Harry Potter Dolls

Undead Harry versus Alive Harry.  Photos via ebay.com, listal.com.


Last, but not least, undead Harry Potter and drunk Ron Weasley.  Seriously, Harry's lips are blue.  The above picture isn't the best, but you can still see that the skin tone is also off, making him look kind of pasty, while his glasses have been enlarged by an errant spell.

Drunk Weasley versus Wistful Weasley. Photos via entertainmentearth.com, harrypotter.wikia.com.
Undead Harry Potter is then followed by the drunken Weasley.  I do appreciate that the doll maker at least attempted to get his hairstyle right (much more so than Harry, above), but the expression on his face just makes him look drunk.  What was the artist going for?  Ambivalence?  Embarrassment?  Apprehension?  Of course, if I went to a party in that getup, I'd probably have a few drinks beforehand in order to start ahead of the game, so to speak.

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